Journal entry

So as like every teen girl i am having boy issues. Along side that i am thinking about what i want in a guy. Recently i have had a guy in my life that makes me feel like the guy in the relationship, and it sucks. At my boarding school i was the only tomboy out of like 36 girls. I did the heavy lifting, opened the doors, killed the spiders and cockroaches. I became the man of the house you could say. After that i was in MC Jr. ROTC, i was one of the guys. I helped out with a lot of the heavy lifting, did the dirty work, i was on marksmanship, i considered myself a guy. I always kind of have, i'm not trans, but i am defiantly a huge northern tomboy. When i was journaling today this came out of it:    I am high strong, strong willed, a tomboy, intuitive, smart, an entrepreneur. I can protect and take care of my self just fine. I want a guy to take care of me, i want someone stronger, dominantish, someone who can let me take that protective tomboy guard down and take care of me. Someone who will make me know i am safe and that i don't need to learn how to shoot a gun to protect the family. Someone who would say no you don't have to own the guns, have a job, make the money, protect the kids, that's my job. Someone who would make sure i would take care of myself, someone who could take care of me mentally, help me be a girl for once in my life.  I hope that this wish comes true someday. 
~Lonestar ☆ Countdown- 41 until 18th birthday 4 until vacation  22 until senior year